Superfail! (aliaspiral) wrote,
Superfail!
aliaspiral

Back, Just In Time

We finally got back to Denver yesterday, with much less issues getting back than there were getting to atlanta in the first place. thank any and all deities.

however, there was one altercation.

we are sitting innocently on the plane, Im next to the window, brandus is in the aisle. I have my tarot cards out, but they arent obvious, if that makes sense. Brandus is watching Prisoner of Azkaban. this is very important. brandus is watching PoA. this is no big deal, right?

so, because he was one of the few who had a computer up, we didnt think much of it when one of the attendents stopped by to see what we were watching. she commented on the popularity of the movie, and i said something smartassed about the website that says i am going to hell for liking Harry Potter. She sees my cards, Brandus makes some comment about being Buddhist and people thinking he is going to hell anyway.

she crouches down beside brandus, in the middle of the aisle, and starts telling us about the time she almost died.

we think she is telling us this, because the three of us share an interest in metaphysical. admittedly, mine ends with tarot, but whatever.

evidently, she died at her house, the EMTs came, she was without oxygen for 20 minutes on the way to the hospital, and then 35 minutes at the hospital. she flew out of her body (yes, flew), passed the EMTs (who had a bad spirit about them), went down a hallway and went to heaven.

end of story, right?

NO. DEAR DEITY NO.

this woman spent HALF AN HOUR BLOCKING THE AISLE, talking to us about what she saw in heaven.

please reread that. HALF AN HOUR.

she is a flight attendent.

she went to heaven. where there are colors not found here. AND, there are animals there, did you know that? she met her guardian angels, but she wasnt allowed to see their faces, only their clothes. and they gave her the choice to go back or stay, and when she choose to go back, her angels walked her to a field. she passed two men talking, and one nodded to her, BEACUSE HE KNEW HER FROM THE TIME SHE WAS IN HEAVEN FIRST. BUT! She just didnt remember him! because they make you forget things!

now, brandus and i are thinking A) this is more than a little weird and B)this is odd even for metaphysical conversations.

people are now trying to get by, and have to keep tapping her on the shoulder.

FINALLY, someone asks her for a drink, and she goes and gets it.

brandus and i breathe a large sigh of relief.

then, she COMES BACK. OMG, she comes back and continues her story.

guess what?! she met Jesus! up there in heaven! and she knew him instantly, because she has seen him a total of three times in her life!

yep. you heard that right.

this woman, a Flight Attendent, spent HALF AN HOUR of her work time trying to CONVERT us. she told brandus he was on the wrong path. she kept telling us how beautiful heaven is, and how wonderful Jesus is, and how YOU ARE ON THE WRONG PATH!

Holy Fuck.

*headdesk*

there is ABSOLUTELY no way i can ever ever catch up on all the lj stuff i have missed, so please please PLEASE comment and tell me about fic or stuff i have missed. i will be checking on my favorite comms, but i cant check everyone and everything. Comment please please please.

and happy new year, by the way.
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