Because I can only focus on one of the three, i shall explain to you about my face. My beautiful, previously undamaged face.
The GOOD news is that my nose isn't broken.
The BAD news is that on Tuesday, I was working with a kid at a table. I leaned over to show him something, and he very suddenly jerked hard my direction, slamming his skull into the bridge of my nose. His only saving grace is that is was an accident. Otherwise I would have thrown him straight out the window.
Like I said, it isn't broken, but I do have a swollen, bruised nose and two black eyes. The black eyes are subtle enough that, instead of looking like I just got a skull to the face, I look like I haven't slept in a week. I'm not sure if that's an improvement.
The doctor said that I would have a four to five day headache and OMG HE WASN'T KIDDING. I worked yesterday, but I drove to work today - realizing on the way that ME DRIVING was a horrible idea after nearly getting in two wrecks in ten minutes - walked in and told the director that i really needed to come home because my head might pop off my body without warning.
I still feel like crap and wanna stay home tomorrow, but I can't. I only have so many sick days, and I need to save them in case the child gets sick.
So, the moral of this story is OW MY HEAD.